5 Self-Esteem Questions for Better Parenting


Let’s face it. Raising kids’ self-esteem isn’t easy. Each of us has reacted like the mother in the following story. If it sounds like you, don’t worry. We understand.

A Mother’s Frustration:
My spine stiffened. My shoulders tightened, and my ears felt as though they had been stabbed with a knife. The sound was a cross between fingernails on a blackboard and a first aid siren. And it was two feet from me.

“Catherine!” I screamed, twirling around from the sink where I was washing dishes.

“Mom, I have to practice my flute.”

“Don’t do it near me. I can’t take it.!” – Grace Witwer Housholder

Building self-esteem isn’t easy to remember when you’re in the middle of a difficult situation. Most of us feel guilty after we explode. We all wish we’d handled it differently. After the difficult situation is over, it’s important to forgive ourselves, try to repair the situation, and move on. With that in mind, I’m offering 5 ways to encourage self-esteem in your children. Hopefully, this will help after you’ve pulled yourself out of the dumps to try again.

5 Self-Esteem Questions for Building Self-Esteem and Character

Do I encourage my child to do good deeds for others?
To avoid self-centeredness teach your child to care about others. Remember, self-esteem without empathy is like a person without a heart.

Do I teach my child to stop negative thoughts?
Negative self-talk is criticism turned inward. It destroys self-esteem. Catch your child when he says, “I’m not good enough.” Teach him to switch to pleasant truths about himself.

Do I model positive thinking?
Your child listens to and watches you every day. If you model self-criticism, discouragement, or anger, your child will follow. Turn yourself around and set your child in a positive direction too.

Do I teach my child to set small goals and follow through?
Learning how to tie his shoes, build a model airplane, or do a book report gives your child a sense of competence. Developing the “I can do it,” attitude is one of the best self-esteem builders your child can take throughout his life.

Do I spend fun time with my child every day?
One of the best ways to convince your child that she is lovable is to spend fun time with her. It convinces her that she’s cool to hang out with. Fun time bonds the both of you in loving ways.

Self-Esteem Conclusion:
Don’t worry if you lose your temper from time to time. Just repair the situation as best you can and move on. Practice the above answers to become an effective parent. You’ll be building self-esteem and character too.



About Jean Tracy, MSS

Jean Tracy has been a family counselor for over 20 years. She is a former, elementary school teacher and is also an author and speaker. Her presentations include "Build Character Now! Practical Tools for Busy Parents" and "Family Meetings: How to Raise a Happy Family. " Subscribe to her free parenting newsletter at KidsDiscuss.com and receive 80 fun activities to share with your kids.

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